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226 April Fool”s Day 2022

3/30/2022

If I get this post completed and up on schedule, it will be available just before April Fool’s Day of 2022, so it seems appropriate not to pretend that this is going to deal with anything very serious. Yes, there IS plenty of serious stuff going on (when ISN’T there?), but I’m not going to deal with it in this post. After all, according to Ecclesiastes 3:1: “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:…” And, if one wants to read as far as verse 4, one finds: “A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;” I take this as evidence that even God accepts the idea that we should engage in joy and happiness on occasion. I also believe that if one can’t have a laugh, or two, on April Fool’s Day (even if it is during Lent) what’s the point? So. ′nuf said!

According to Wikipedia (which I claim [always have] is a perfectly adequate source for much basic information, if not always for truly “scholarly,” stuff): “April Fools' Day or April Fool's Day is an annual custom on 1 April consisting of practical jokes and hoaxes. Jokesters often expose their actions by shouting ‘April Fools!’ at the recipient.” The article goes on to point out that the origins of this tradition are unclear, but widespread, with similar behavior in most European countries. It also suggests that there is a possible connection to the medieval “Feast of Fools,” but that is (apparently) far from certain. It seems pretty likely that it is European-based, although it has spread to some places in the Middle East, etc.

Of course, it’s quite conceivable that the spread of the idea COULD have been through colonial influences. But, in the long run, who cares? The point is to have fun by pointing out the silliness which affects all of us on occasion and accept that it’s a part of being human to be a bit crazy now and then. I like it and I’m going to celebrate it. If you can’t or don’t choose to recognize this obvious (to me, at least) fact of human nature, don’t bother to continue. And, I’m sorry for you!

So, here’s a few examples of the sort of stupidity silliness which I have run across in the not very distant past in various places online. I chose them, not so I can call you an “April Fool,” but because they remind me that there’s a bit of a fool in all of us.

As I’ve said before, I am a frequent patron of the local Y because my medical insurance pays for my membership and it’s less than a mile (about 5-7 minutes) from our house. They’ve never asked me to do a survey about how I heard about them, but, when I saw this online, I got quite a chuckle.

You MAY have to be a “child of the 70”s to understand that, but I suspect others will still “get it.”

Perhaps it’s because I am aware of the fact that I’m an “old guy” now, but I enjoyed this “Dustin” cartoon even though I take some small offense at the idea that what may be perfectly obvious to the guy who built something, may not be to someone who just wants to use it. I also dislike the assumption that not being a preteen makes one incapable of logic, critical thinking, or the ability to “figure things out.”

I suppose that it’s also because: 1.) I have found that MANY “instruction” manuals are complete and total failures in that they don’t convey ANY useful information because they assume that the entire world already knows what the “technical” writer knows; 2.) the “technical” writer doesn’t understand how to USE the product (whatever it is) even if he/she did invent it; 3.) the writer barely knows the language he is supposed to be writing in; and, 4.) it’s based on the assumption that the purchaser shouldn’t have anything better to do than to figure out the product through trial and error.

I suppose that I should admit that what are often called “instructions” are a pet peeve of mine. All too often, they seem to either assume I’m too stupid to be anything but a source of money for the manufacturer or that I have the intelligence of a vegetable and so it doesn’t matter if they provide useful information, or not, as I’ll never figure it out, anyway. Needless to say, that does NOT make me happy. Here’s some examples:

I think what annoys me most is the assumption that younger people now-a-days are “so much smarter than their elders.” Okay, I get the fact that I AM an “elder,” but I find THIS (see below) amusing because it seems to have at least some elements of truth in it.

I also have to wonder why so many “youngsters” feel that somewhat older people “just can’t figure things out” when I contemplate things like this “sign” I found somewhere!

Now, I won’t argue that older people are immune from falling for scams and other forms of stupidity, but I WILL suggest that “olders” aren’t the only ones to whom THIS applies!

Nor will I accept that ALL “April Fool’s jokes” were actually intended to be such. Sometimes, they just turned out that way, as in this case:

Now, if only I had known THAT before I retired here…. See you in a couple of weeks. I hope your life has at least some occasional laughter. It’s good for you!

🖖🏼 LLAP,

Dr. B
“Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic; capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it.” ―Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

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225 Saint Patrick’s Day and Other Thoughts Irish

3/16/2022

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As I started to work on this post, it occurred to me that I had it on my calendar for posting in close proximity to Saint Patrick’s Day. Therefore, it seemed appropriate to note that fact. However, as I thought about that, and the fact that I wanted to keep it light and amusing, it was obvious that it might lead to some “Irish” jokes. Now, “ethnic” humor is, most often, considered to be based on stereotypes which are labelled as “politically incorrect” these days.

My experience, however, is that many (perhaps most) of the funniest (and, often, the most stereotypical) “ethnic” jokes I’ve ever heard have been told by people of the ethnicity referenced. As an example, I cite the musical, Fiddler on the Roof, music, lyrics and book written by folks of Jewish extraction, based on stories by a Jewish (Yiddish) author. While there is, of course, more to it than “ethnic” humor, there IS a lot of that present in it.

Personally, I think it’s too bad that we, as a society, believe that ethnic humor HAS to be assumed to be intended to be aimed at putting people down. Nobody tells “Jewish Mother” jokes like people from a Jewish background, and the same kind of thing could be said about at least most, if not all, ethnicities, races, occupations, religions, etc.; (just ask a Catholic to tell “priest or nun” jokes). Most of the time, you’ll hear a good one about Father “so-and-so,” or Sister “what’s her name.” Anyway, in honor of my own Irish heritage and St. Patrick’s Day, I thought I’d post some, hopefully, amusing thoughts on the people and ways of Ireland. If you find them too “politically incorrect,” I figure that’s your problem. I enjoy them! Or, as we Irish might well say;

Thinking about Saint Patrick’s Day behavior and the pandemic which is still about;

Of course, anyone who has ever seen John Ford’s great 1952 movie, The Quiet Man, with John Wayne and Maureen O’Hara, will understand why I say that the Wizard of Id must, really, be Irish, and, if you haven’t seen the movie, the Irish in me says that you should. But to get back to the Wizard of Id.

(If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll understand. If not, when you do see it, you’ll get my point!)

Ireland is, of course, known as a land of writers. Congreve, Goldsmith, Joyce, O’Casey, Shaw, Sheridan, Synge, Wilde, Yeats, Beckett, (please excuse the emphasis on dramatists, but they are the ones I know best) and a good many more are “Irish” writers, and there are many more around the world of Irish extraction. I have a theory that Ireland has bred writers because the Irish culture (being frequently suppressed by the English government) had to rely on storytelling for its preservation. It’s also true that many Irish were too poor to go to school. But they could gather around the fire and listen to stories. So, here are a few stories I’ve picked up over the years. Some may be traditional, but others probably aren’t. I really don’t care, I have enjoyed them. Maybe you will, too.

I found this one in a column in The Omaha World-Herald about this time of year in 2019.

A German spy sent to Ireland in World War II is instructed to meet an Irish spy named Murphy and confirm his identity by saying, “The weather could change by Tuesday.” After the German parachutes into Ireland, he sets off for town. Along the way, he asks a farmer where to find Murphy.

“Well, sir, it all depends on which Murphy,” says the farmer. “We have Murphy the doctor, Murphy the postal carrier, Murphy the stonemason and Murphy the teacher. As a matter of fact, I, too, am Murphy, Murphy the farmer.”

The German gets an idea.

“The weather could change by Tuesday,” he says.

“Aye,” says the farmer, “you’ll be wanting Murphy the spy.”

The Irish, even Irish priests, have been known to take a wee tipple every so often and that has, on occasion, led to interesting “situations.” For example,

An Irish priest is driving down to New York for the St. Patrick's Day parade and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut.

The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car, so he asks the priest, "Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Just water," says the priest.

"Then why do I smell wine?"

The priest looks at the bottle, picks it up, sniffs it and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!”

I don’t know how many jokes I have heard over the years which begin with, “An Irishman walked into a bar….” Here’s a variation I like a lot.

An Irishman goes into a bar in America and orders three whiskeys. The barman asks: "Would it be better if I put all three shots in one glass?"

The Irishman replies: "No! I have two other brothers back at home, so every time I come into a pub, I order a shot for them both.”

The same pattern continued for several weeks.

Then, one week, the Irishman orders just two whiskeys.

The barman asks: "Did something happen one of your brothers?" "Oh no," replies the Irishman. "I just decided to quit drinking!”

As I suspect the Irish could tell you, language can get you into trouble pretty easily. Here’s an example of how that can work.

Mick wanted to place an ad in the local paper, so he gave it a call.

“Is that The Ballycashel Echo?" asks Mick. "How much would it be to put an ad in your paper?"

"Five pounds an inch," a woman replies. "Why? What are you selling?"

"A ten-foot ladder," said Mick before slamming the phone down.

It’s been said that the Irish can have a temper. Still most folks, at least in modern America, think of the Irish as being strong “church-going” people; probably because of their traditionally strong ties to the Catholic Church. This means that there’s a lot of Irish humor which involves tempers, as well as priests and/or nuns. Here’s an example which includes both:

A sobbing Ms. Murphy approaches Father O’Grady after mass.

He says: “So what’s bothering you?”

She replies: “Oh, Father, I’ve terrible news. My husband passed away last night.”

The priest says: “Oh, Mary, that’s terrible. Did he have any last requests?”

"Certainly, Father," she replied. “He said: “Please, Mary, put down that damn gun.”

But, perhaps my favorite “nun” story is this one:

The wise old Mother Superior from County Tipperary was dying.

The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable.

They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen.

Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.

Back at Mother Superior's bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother Superior drank a little, then a little more. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop.

"Mother," the nuns pleaded, "Please give us some wisdom before you pass."

She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said: "Don't sell that cow."

I think I’ll call that enough for this post. I hope Saint Patrick’s Day finds you in good company, with a glass of whatever you like best in your hand. In my case, it may well be coffee here at home as I don’t want to fight the drunks on the road (many, probably most, of whom will NOT be Irish). Unfortunately, it won’t be in this coffee mug, but a guy can wish…

In any event, as we Irish say, “Sláinte.” I’ll be back in a couple of weeks,

🖖🏼 LLAP,

Dr. B
“Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic; capable of both inflicting
injury, and remedying it.” ―Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

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224 Lent & More Signs Encountered on the Road of Life

3/2/2022

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As I post this, Mardi Gras is over and Lent has started for Christians or those raised in the Christian tradition. Wikipedia suggests that,

Lent is a solemn religious observance in the Christian liturgical calendar commemorating the 40 days Jesus spent fasting in the desert, according to the Gospels of Matthew, Mark and Luke, before beginning his public ministry, during which he endured temptation by Satan. Which days are enumerated as being part of Lent differs between denominations, although in all of them Lent is described as lasting for a total duration of 40 days. In Western Churches, Lent begins on Ash Wednesday and ends approximately six weeks later; depending on the Christian denomination and local custom….

Here in Omaha, that means “Fish Fry Fridays” are getting underway. I DO like fish and chips, but I haven’t partaken of the Omaha Fish Fry scene as it appears to be mostly an opportunity to stand in a long line waiting for your fish dinner while consuming large quantities of beer. That’s probably an exaggeration (it IS completely based on conversations overheard from others), but one does get that impression, (or at least I have). Now don’t think I’m totally opposed to an occasional beer (generally I prefer Guinness), but I don’t care for even that in large quantities and I’m perfectly capable of finding (or preparing my own) fish and chips when I have the desire, so the “scene” doesn’t seem very attractive to me, especially since Bonnie likes neither fish, nor beer. There are several things she enjoys at our favorite Irish pub, however, so we usually go there when I’m dying for fish. The fact that they also have Guinness on tap doesn’t bother me either. But enough of that…

Lent begins after all the partying of Carnival (which ends with Mardi Gras) and is (theoretically) supposed to be a solemn 40 day season that ends with the great celebration of Easter. I’ve not ever really seen this followed very strictly (especially by the Irish around St. Patrick’s Day, which always comes during Lent), but I’ve never lived in a monastery or a convent, either, so I can’t say it never is such a time. Not being a particularly strict and active follower of orthodox Christian tradition, Lent isn’t of great importance to me, although I DO think it serves a legitimate, religious purpose for those who choose to have it do so.

However, I don’t choose to spend this time in mourning so that I can celebrate Easter. It’s also true, of course, that Easter is inextricably linked with Jewish Passover celebrations and numerous spring equinox celebrations from cultures all over the world. In fact, the word, easter, is derived from Eastre (Northumbrian Eostre), from Proto-Germanic *austron-, "dawn," also the name of a goddess of fertility and spring, perhaps originally of sunrise, whose feast was celebrated at the spring equinox. Since the equinox falls during the early spring (Duh!), that seems perfectly reasonable to me.

In any event, I refuse to go out of my way to be unhappy for forty days every year. Life is just too short, and reality is depressing enough. So, here are a few things to try to cheer people up. If you find that offensive, don’t go on, or wait until Lent is over.

Anyone who has followed this blog for very long knows that I have a passion for signs. I find them to be infinitely fascinating as they can be intended to be amusing, amusing by accident, or amusing completely by mistake. But they often ARE amusing and, sometimes, I find them and get a laugh. Laughs are important, so I collect such pictures to use on those occasions when a laugh seems desirable. Since I enjoy a good laugh, that can be almost anytime that I don’t have something more serious on my mind.

Here’s a favorite of mine that I encountered in a store near Christmas a few years ago.

Makes ya think, doesn’t it…. The scary thing is, it just might be true….

Thinking back to my last post, brings this one to mind (although it wasn’t really a sign)…

Shortly before Xmas, I saw this one which seemed to be worthy of passing on, although perhaps I should have done it then…

Nothing against Mr. Bieber, but I don’t think of him and Chritmas carols in the same breath! (And, NO, I did NOT change the spelling of “Christmas,” that’s how I found it!)

That brings to mind the fact that far too many people, far too often just don’t proof their work adequately before they publish it. Yes, I HAVE been guilty of this, but I can also enjoy it when someone else is guilty (and be embarrassed when the fault is mine). But, THIS one is just funny…

If it doesn’t jump off the page at you, look more closely. It’s surprising! Or, maybe it isn’t.

Speaking of surprises, this picture was surprising to me….

On the other hand, given what I know about the Internet, computers and social media, THIS one wasn’t…

Of course, such things were somewhat spoiled a LONG time ago by being warned by THIS cartoon from The New Yorker

Speaking of “Things Nobody Knows,” did THIS ever bother you?

Then, of course, there’s also a major problem of “Adulthood” which NOBODY has yet resolved…

I’ll be back,

LLAP,

Dr. B
  “Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic; capable of both
inflicting injury, and remedying it.”                   ―Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

P.S. I FINALLY got away from “serious” stuff. It could be a mistake, as there is plenty of serious stuff to consider, but it made me happy! RSB

P.P.S. Enjoy some fish and chips, and, maybe a beer, on St. Paddy’s Day. I like mine with Tartar sauce and no catsup, if you have other preferences, that’s okay, too.   RSB

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226 April Fool”s Day 2022

225 Saint Patrick’s Day and Other Thoughts Irish

224 Lent & More Signs Encountered on the Road of Life

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