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163 Travelling: Apparently An Odd Bit of Pleasure

11/20/2019

Bonnie and I took a trip recently and it got me to thinking about traveling for pleasure.  When you think about it, that notion seems rather oxymoronic, at least for many.  They argue that if they aren’t fighting traffic, the weather, or fatigue on the road (assuming that they are driving), they are dealing with lost luggage, mediocre food, surly TSA agents and other harassments in airports.  Bus and/or train travel used to be options, both of which had their advantages and their drawbacks, but they aren’t really even options for most people nowadays.  Still, travel is something which many of us engage in with some frequency and not always for strictly business purposes.

I confess that I am one of those unusual people who actually enjoys driving.  I don’t know how I caught this illness, but I suspect that it might have been the summer after my Freshman year in college, when my buddy, Chris, and I drove from Chicago out to the Black Hills of South Dakota to camp on his uncle’s ranch while seeing the sights.  I still remember Mt. Rushmore by moonlight.  Quite a sight!  Anyway, that time with my best friend might have done it.  Or, it could have been an outgrowth of the many weekend (and occasional longer) trips I was a part of while touring with the Indiana Theatre Company while I was working on my M.A.  I know the idea was well established before I was married, because when Bonnie and I moved to Cullowhee, I actually wasn’t all that upset by the 700-mile (each way) car trips home to the Chicago area to see our families.  Even the then small, bored children couldn’t make that trip all that bad (which may say a good deal about Bonnie’s skills in keeping the children occupied on the lengthy trip).  In those days, I did all the driving while Bonnie handled the “kid-bashing,” which was our term for what would be called “child wrangling” in the theatre.

In any event, Bonnie and I travel with some frequency right down to the present day, and, mostly by car. Obviously, we fly when we go across an ocean, or have to go a very long distance on a tight schedule, but, mostly, we drive.  Somehow, we always seem to find things to talk about, or something to look at, or (on RARE occasions) something to listen to, which makes the time less boring and more pleasant.  Audiobooks can be a treat, but we usually save them for when we have to drive alone.  It’s also true that we share the driving a great deal more than we did “back in the day,” but that’s because I’ve always thought Bonnie was a good driver.  In those days, she was just better at dealing with the kids than I was.

I suppose we drive most of the time because it’s convenient and tends to be a good deal cheaper than flying.  That, probably, is also because we know that we are going to want/need a car when we get wherever we are going and renting one can be an expensive hassle.  I also think it may have something to do with the fact that we enjoy being together, so the trip is part of the pleasure.  For too many people, taking a vacation is, apparently, mostly about “being there,” with little thought to possible pleasure along the way.  That’s not true for us.  When we take a trip, it may include (often does) visiting friends and/or family, especially now that we are retired.  But it also may include visiting places we love, like the Biltmore Estate, which can be combined with visiting some friends down North Carolina way.

Since it took a while for us to be able to sell our house there after we retired, we made quite a few trips back there just to check on the old house and deal with maintenance issues.  Of course, we would combine those trips with visits to Biltmore and some of the other attractions of the area.  In fact, we’re still Passholders to Biltmore and we still try to get back there several times a year as we do love to see the changes in the house decorations and walk in the gardens a bit.  And we make other trips, as well.  We’ve been known to go to Des Moines in Iowa, just for lunch, since we’re fond of having lunch at On the Border and we don’t have one in Omaha.  We haven’t yet made the trip to Independence, MO, for the same reason, but we have talked about it.  There’s also The Celtic Ranch in Weston, MO which is a bit of fun.

I confess that, while we love our kids, having traveled with them when they were small does make me see the humor of the following:

There were times (many years ago) when something like that might have crossed my mind.

I probably should confess that I have noticed (perhaps it was always true) that Bonnie and I go about the process of preparation for a trip quite differently these days. Yes, we both consult the weather forecast for where we are going and for any stops along the way. But we tend to resort to fairly different approaches to packing.

This might well have come from the fact that Bonnie was in charge of getting the kids ready when they were small, so she did have to pack for three people.  I also have to admit that the “fashion gods’ rules” are infinitely more complex for women than is true for men.  And, women’s fashion is more complicated in terms of having a need for the “correct” shoes, purse, and other accessories for every outfit.  Men just need to be decently covered and rarely have to worry about having items which all “match” properly, etc.  It IS MUCH simpler for men.  So, while the above MAY be a bit exaggerated, I do find that I, generally, have a much easier time packing than she does.

In any case, I’ve done my share of travelling, and our recent trip got me to thinking about that.  While doing so, I was reminded of something I ran across a few years ago and have modified to suit my real circumstances a bit.  I would argue that each of these statements is (mostly) true.

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots.  Apparently, you can't go alone.  You have to be in Cahoots with someone.

I've also never been in Cognito.  I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane.  They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there.  I have made a couple of trips there thanks to my friends, family, students, etc.

I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.

I have been in Decisive on occasions...at least I think so.

I have also been in Doubt, but it makes me uncomfortable.  So, I try to live by the motto: Sometimes wrong, but never in Doubt.

I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to not bend, such as in grading standards, paper deadlines, and the like.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense!  It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart!  At my age, I need all the stimuli I can get!

And, sometimes I think I am in Vincible, but life frequently shows me that I am not.

People repeatedly tell me I'm in Denial, but I'm certain I've never been there before!

I have been in Trouble many times; the older I get it seems, the easier it is to get there.

I’ve actually been to Morrow.  It’s a little town in Georgia just southeast of the Atlanta airport.  We used to go shopping at Southlake Mall there, many years ago.

I probably should admit that travelling isn’t as easy for me now as it used to be.  My mid-seventies body likes to remind me that I’m not as young as I used to be, so I don’t travel as easily as I did “back in the day.”  Still, I manage to get around reasonably well and we still have a good time, although at, perhaps, a somewhat slower rate than we used to maintain.  I expect we’ll keep travelling when the wanderlust kicks in, so I’m not going to complain.

While all of us aren’t as young as we used to be, I hope that all of my friends still manage to enjoy the pleasures of at least occasional travels.  As Roy and Dale used to say, “Happy trails to you, ‘til we meet again.”

LLAP

Dr. B

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162 Advice Which You MAY Find To Be of Some Use

11/6/2019

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As is probably obvious from the various bits of weird stuff which show up in this blog, I “collect” things which strike me as amusing, strange, cute, clever, annoying, or in some way as being of enough interest to think they might be worth a second look.  Since I retired, I have spent many hours trying to make some sense out of what was a large (and continuously growing) mishmash of these items.  In other words, I guess I was channeling my mother (the librarian) to try to make some kind of order out of the chaos.  Needless to say, I haven’t sorted things out to a degree which would make sense to anybody but me (and even I can’t always find things as quickly as I could wish). Still, it’s been a bit of a challenge, though it hasn’t been unpleasant.  It’s even been of some use in finding stuff to post about.  Which gets me to the point of all this.

In thinking about what to write about this time, I was looking through my large folder of stuff entitled “Waiting for a Blog Post” and noticed that I have a lot of stuff in a folder entitled “Advice.”  It even has sub-folders specifically for “Advice for Men” and “Advice for Women,” but I decided to stay in the broadest category this time.

Now, at about this point some readers are probably saying to themselves, “Why should we pay any attention to you?  You’re just an old, tired, run-down ex-professor who thinks he knows a lot.”  Well I’ll confess to being, old, tired and run-down, but I’ve always known there were many others who knew at least as much as I, and probably a good deal more.  Still, I think it’s the duty of those of us who have lived a while to try to assist those who come along behind us to have an easier time.  So, while I have never participated in activities such as shown below, I know that they exist because us “old” folks find it hard to resist making suggestions and offering advice, when we think they might help.

As suggested above, advice from “old coots” like me may, or may not, be of much value. That’s probably why I “borrow” much of it from others who may well be brighter than I. That’s to say nothing of the fact the I wish I’d said some of these things. See below:

Okay, Morgan Freeman probably isn’t God (although he has played him) but I hope you’ll agree that this statement rings fairly true.  On the other hand, I think that the voice of God would have to sound a lot like the voice of James Earl Jones.  That’s the sort of voice which suggests the sort of power and authority I tend to associate with the Deity more than any other I can think of.  It’s unfortunate, however, that it’s also the voice of Darth Vader, whom I don’t tend to think of as resembling a Deity, although he does have some pretty impressive powers.

The picture below probably should be in one of my “Signs Seen Along the Way” posts, but it seemed to fit how I was thinking while I was putting this together.  I DID live in the South for a long time, after all.  Of course, I was told that I could never qualify as a “true” Southerner (which is probably fair enough), but I did qualify as “A Gentleman of the North.”  That was good enough for me.  Although I thought then, and still do think, that such regional designations were silly and unproductive.  I’m an American!  My family, in one form or another, has been here since a good while before the United States was even thought of.  Still, I find regional differences to be a source of some amusement, as long as they don’t use them to imply that some of us are better than others.  After all, I could argue that almost all of you are “johnny-come-lately” immigrants, whom we “real" Americans shouldn’t have let come in to “spoil” our country.  Of course, then we would have to figure out a way to deal with the peoples who arrived before we did, but we can certainly do that, because “those people” don’t really count, do they?

Anyway, I saw this in a shop somewhere and liked it a lot.  I THINK it may have been in the “Traditions” shop in Antler Hill Village on the Biltmore Estate, but I’m not sure.  Obviously, it was in a store, as it was on a table with some other stuff.  In any event, it struck me as an amusing (and somewhat true) comment about Southern behavior, based on over forty years of living there.

Having worked in theatre most of my life, I confess that I grew tired of the notion of a great many folks that the “proper” way to do a production was “the way it was done in New York.”  That, of course, can lead to difficulties when producing a script which may not be modern enough to have originated in New York, but some would argue that we, as a culture, have “outgrown” such quaint scripts as those of the Greeks, the Elizabethans, Moliere, etc.  After all, they were such a long time ago that they couldn’t possibly be of any interest today, could they?  Besides, they were first performed in such “antiquated” styles as to be incomprehensible to “modern” audiences.

Now I don’t think one should ignore original production ideas, but I would argue that each of us has the right, as actors, designers or directors, to develop our own ideas as to how best to develop an approach to our work on a production.  I, personally, have been a part of a wide variety of productions from various periods and in various production styles.  Some of those productions have, probably, resembled their original productions, but many have not.  Some have even used techniques from other periods, cultures, and styles.  (NOTE: unabashed plug for the value of studying theatre [and other forms of] history.)  Of course, it's also true that it’s illegal for designers and/or directors to steal (copy) the intellectual property (design, choreography, direction) of someone else (original production team), but it also has to do with the idea that we can learn things from those who came before us.

In any event, when my sister exposed me to the work of Mary Engelbreit, I became very fond of this picture from a coffee mug, which now belongs to Bonnie and me.  It reminds me that the “New York way” isn’t, necessarily the only, or even the best, way to accomplish something.

I accept that some others may not appreciate my opinions and/or advice, but I don’t wish to be too harsh in my judgement of them. After all, forgiveness is a good thing. However...
See below:

Still, while I do believe in “turning the other cheek,” there are times when some people should stop and consider the idea expressed below:

Yes, even I can be pushed too far. The notion which some (many) marketeers (and scammers) apparently have that my phone lines and email systems were invented for them to sell me stuff I don’t want and/or to cheat me out of my money annoys me a lot. My kids are now too old for me to be able to apply this bit of advice, but I encourage you to pass it along to as many people who CAN use it as possible.

That’s clearly enough of this sort of thing for the time being. I’ll be back in a couple of weeks with something else for your possible edification and/or amusement.

LLAP

Dr.B

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161 Thoughts on Halloween 2019

10/23/2019

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I love Halloween! Apparently, so do a lot of other folks, because I’m told that it’s second only to Christmas in terms of how much money people spend on stuff related to it. And, yes, it is a holiday (holy day), because it is the eve (day before) of the Christian All Saints (Hallows) Day. Of course, it is also related to the Mexican Day of the Dead, the Celtic Samhain, and other autumnal/harvest celebrations throughout many cultures. So, while Halloween is a shortened form of All Hallows’ Eve; because celebrations of this type precede Christianity by many centuries, some “Christians” would like to convince us that it is actually some sort of Satanic celebration, when, in fact, it’s nothing of the sort. But I don’t really want to get into religious studies in this post. I do discuss some things related to this holiday in Posts #8, 44, 73, 105, 132 in the Archives, for anyone who might be interested in further thoughts of mine about it.

Still, in spite of the declared dislike of this (“Satan’s”) day, it’s hard to ignore the fact that Christianity has, in fact, “borrowed” a great many things from various forms of (mostly European) Paganism, and not just stuff related to Halloween. I saw a reference to tee shirts being sold at some “neo-pagan” shop with this design printed on it not long ago, which reminded me of that fact all over again.

There are many connotations to the various aspects of Halloween-related ideas and stuff, many of which I find amusing. “Trick or Treating” is almost certainly related to “Souling,” which was the practice of dressing up and giving and receiving of ‘Soul Cakes” as a part of Allhallowtide and Christmastide celebrations. Carrying lanterns and singing are also a part of this tradition, so it also seems likely that “caroling” at Christmas time is simply another outgrowth of the same tradition.

I suppose that it’s the connection to the idea of spooks, etc. being around at this time of year that makes Halloween supposed to be “scary.” (It IS true that many of the autumnal traditions are based around the idea of honoring one’s ancestors at this time of year.) But speaking of truly scary, there’s this picture I ran across of what was labelled as “The Bathroom Floor From Hell.” What do you think?

I confess, I would NOT want to go into THAT bathroom unprepared.

Still, Halloween is the time of year which we associate with witches flying on brooms (or broomsticks) which reminds me of this Wizard of Id comic strip.

For many of us, however, Halloween is a time for “dressing up” in some sort of costume and decorating our home (inside AND outside for many people) with various sorts of monsters, spiders, ghosts, goblins, and other varieties of “scary” stuff.

As I am very fond of the musical, The Little Shop of Horrors, I was highly amused when I saw this “table decoration” in the “Hyde and Eek Boutique”© at our local Target the other day. It brought back fond memories of at least two productions in Cullowhee, as well as the movie.

For most of us, Halloween is, primarily, an occasion for dressing up, giving candy to cute, costumed children, and going to parties in some sort of costume, usually the more outlandish, the better.

Our daughter, Maggi, is lucky enough to work for a company (Hyatt Hotels Corp.) which allows/ encourages their employees to have some fun at the office where she works by wearing costumes to work around Halloween time. I’m not sure they really had her in mind when they started this policy, but I understand Maggi was quite a hit with her costume a year ago. So much so that they had her pose with a display piece from the wall.

Speaking of costumes, by the way, as some of you know, I am quite fond of the Disney/Pixar movie Brave, in spite of the fact that most people seem to want to ignore it because Merida (the heroine) really doesn’t want to just be a “princess” in the tradition of most other Disney Princesses who need a Prince to “complete their lives.” Anyway, I’m (personally) very fond of Merida who reminds me just a bit of my own two daughters (also red-heads), as well as a few female students I have known who impressed me with their drive, determination, talent and intelligence (not all of whom were red-heads). In any event, when I saw the movie, I knew that the dress Merida’s mother, Queen Elinor, is shown wearing seemed a bit familiar, but it wasn’t until I found the picture below that I realized from where.

The picture on the right is an 1889 painting by John Singer Sargent of Ellen Terry (the first actress “knighted” as a GBE by the British monarch) in her costume as Lady Macbeth. I think the similarities are quite obvious. I’ve always found it interesting that the shiny “spots” on Terry’s dress were actually the wings of beetles sewn onto the fabric. In any event, I really like this costume and Halloween makes me think of such things.

For many folks, however, the most memorable part of Halloween is the costume parties. Now, I don’t want to discourage people from having a good time, but as I turned 75 this fall, I am reminded that I’m not as young as I used to was. You’re probably not either, so take it a little easy, or you may end up feeling like the Wizard of Id, who seems to have had a rough night.

Have a good, safe Halloween.
LLAP
Dr. B

P.S.      By the way, I hope you have (had) a Happy St. Crispin’s Day on Oct. 25!
            If you don’t catch the reference, check out Henry V, Act IV, Scene iii, 18–67.
            RSB

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160 Justice: Do We Actually Understand the Concept?

10/10/2019

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Recently, there has been a lot of coverage in the news of the trial of Amber Guyger, the white police officer who shot an African American man in HIS own apartment, which she claimed she thought was HERS. Now I admit that I haven’t followed all of the details of this case all that terribly closely; but she was immediately arrested, admitted that she shot the man, and claimed that it was all a great mistake on her part.  Be that as it may, her trial has come to a conclusion just a couple of weeks ago.

The case went to the jury, after extensive analysis of the personal lives of both the victim and the perpetrator in the popular press.  (As one might expect, the victim was, generally, presented as second only to Jesus in the perfection of his life, etc.; while the perpetrator was presented as a most unpleasant individual, who was either having an affair with her married partner, or trying to, and was generally portrayed as someone who probably should never have been allowed to have been a police officer; potentially even, someone who should never have been allowed to be armed.)  None of which, of course really has anything to do with this case.  In the fullness of time, the jury returned a verdict of guilty of murder and, in the sentencing phase, established that she should be sentenced to ten years in jail and eligible for parole in about five.

Immediately, we started seeing television news stories about the “reaction” of some of the public to this development.  As has been all too common in recent years, much of this reaction has been demands for “Justice for (whomever the current victim is)!”  We have seen this sort of thing all too frequently in the last few years.  I confess that I just don’t understand the “thinking” which appears to be going on in this sort of thing.

I hope that I don’t come off as racist in noting the fact that most of the time the sorts of protests we have seen in relation to this case, and numerous others, have developed in relation to cases of “white” on “black” crime, especially in cases involving white police officers and black victims.  I have no intention of arguing that there hasn’t been a long history of, essentially, institutionalized racism in many police forces, as well as many other organizations of a wide variety of types (unions, professional groups, some businesses, fraternal organizations, etc.).  I’m pretty sure that there has been, even without spending much time seeking data on the issue.  What upsets me, however, is that the term “Justice” is being demeaned and diminished by these types of actions by some people and the press.

So, what IS “justice?  According to my dictionary, justice is “… the maintenance or administration of what is just,especially by the impartial adjustment of conflicting claims or the assignment of merited rewards or punishments.”1  In this definition,  I believe that “just” means fair to all concerned and/or in compliance with established law, or something to that effect.

So, let’s look at this case in what I think is appropriate detail, and what I believe is factually accurate.  The victim, a black man named Botham Jean was killed in his own apartment while watching TV and eating ice cream by a white, female police officer who was coming off a long (15-16 hour) shift and, while entering what she claims she thought was her own apartment.  She encountered an unknown, black man, whom she proceeded to shoot at twice, striking him once, and killing him.  She, as I understand it, reported this to the police fairly quickly, they arrived, she admitted to shooting the now deceased victim, and was, reasonably promptly, arrested on a charge of manslaughter.  A couple of months later, she was indicted by a grand jury for murder.

Eventually, the case came to trial in the appropriate court; a jury was seated (with the participation of counsel for both the prosecution and the defense); and the trial was held, consisting of presentation of the evidence and the examination of witnesses.  Counsel for both sides were allowed to make opening and closing statements as to their interpretation of the facts of the case, the jury retired to a private space to consider their decision as to guilt or innocence of the defendant to the charge(s) against the her.  A decision was reached by that jury (in this case, guilty).  So the trial entered a “sentencing phase,” where arguments as to the appropriate extent of punishment were presented.  The jury again retired to make their decision and returned a verdict of ten years in prison (with eligibility for parole after five) as being appropriate in this case.  Those are what I believe to be the facts of this case.

As a reasonable person (which I like to think I am, in spite of the fact that I am quite aware of my lack of perfection), I would suggest that Botham Jean HAS received “justice” in this case.  Now, I’m not going to suggest that this case was resolved in a way which was pleasing to everyone.  I think that I understand that this resolution may not be any more emotionally satisfying to some than the verdict of “Innocent” was satisfying to everyone in the infamous murder trial of O. J. Simpson.

Now, I am human enough to wish that the world always conformed to my wishes.  I do think that O.J. probably got away with murder and I think the sentence in this case probably should have been longer.  BUT, I didn’t have to make those decisions and I KNOW that I am not in possession of all the evidence which was presented in either of those trials.  Nor did I have the responsibility of making those decisions.  I’m just reacting to what I heard on the “news” on TV.  Note: NEWS is, or should be, the facts as they can be established.  Most of what we see on television, especially on the cable “news” channels is NOT, in my opinion, actually news, but commentary, which can be interesting, but is only factual in that it is what someone thinks (or, at least, says she/he thinks) about the facts.

I would argue that “Justice” is a lot like “News,” in that the concept is pretty widely misunderstood.  To go back to Webster’s definition; it states that justice is supposed to deal with determining what is fair to all concerned in an impartial manner.  That’s why we established in the Constitution that we are supposed to have trials and determine verdicts by a jury of our peers.  And, unless it can be established that something improper occurred during that trial, the verdict can’t be rejected and have the defendant retried on the same charge.

That may, or may not, be particularly emotionally satisfying to either the prosecution, the defendant, or the public at large.  But it IS justice!  Note: the definition of justice quoted above does not say anything about justice being emotionally satisfying to either of the aggrieved parties, or the general public (or any specific subset of it).

There is a reason why the figure of Justice is portrayed as blind or blindfolded and holding a set of scales in one hand and a sword in the other.  JUSTICE is blind so that she can be impartial (fair to all without consideration of irrelevant factors).  She uses the scales to “weigh” the evidence (facts) of the case, and wields a sword symbolizing judicial power.

Justice isn’t supposed to be about being emotionally satisfying to observers.  It’s supposed to be about doing the best we can to be fair and honest in our dealings with each other.  When socially acceptable standards are violated by ANYONE, that individual is supposed to be subject to trial and, upon conviction, sentenced to an appropriate punishment.  It is, perhaps, worth noting that fully one half (FIVE) of the first ten Amendments to the US Constitution (those ten being what are referred to as the “Bill of Rights”) deal with questions relating to justice, trials, bail, indictment, etc.

That may well be a result of the fact that a fair number of the charges expressed against the English government (the King) in the Declaration of Independence were related to the perceived violations of traditional British law placed on the English colonies in America by that government.  In other words, they seem to be saying, “If you expect us to be English citizens, we should have the same access to English law as other English citizens, and the same rights under it.”  In any event, the Bill of Rights includes attempts to clarify the rules by which justice would be achieved in the United States.  It’s also worth noting, I think, that the Bill of Rights enumerates only restrictions on the government’s ability to interfere with our lives, especially in relation to our ability to seek and obtain justice.

What all this really boils down to is the fact that justice doesn’t have to satisfy our desire for revenge.  What it is intended to provide us with is the best attempt that can be achieved at being fair to all concerned and, upon conviction, being equitable in sentencing.  Do we always achieve this?  Probably not.  But I think the case can be made that justice is, generally, served.  And when it is not, legal appeals provide a means to correct that situation.  While our system may not be perfect, personally, I prefer it to simply letting some individual decide, based on whatever criteria he/she chooses to apply (or ignore).  I think that’s what the “Rule of Law” refers to.  The best attempt we can achieve to obtain justice for all.  I think that is a good thing, even when I may not fully agree with the result.
1 https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/justice accessed, Oct 4, 2019.

LLAP,

Dr. B

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159 A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Theatre

9/27/2019

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Having written about my life/career in theatre at what was probably greater length than anyone cared about last time, I thought I’d do a post of some theatre-related humor.

I ran across this story a good while ago.  While it probably deals with a movie theatre, having spent a lot of time doing “front-of-the-house” both as a student, and, later, as a faculty member, I found this to be a pretty successful attempt to make a joke out of every House Manager’s nightmare.

An old man lay awkwardly sprawled across three entire seats in the theater.  When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, "Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat."

The old man didn't budge.

The usher became more impatient.  "Sir, if you don't get up from there, I'm going to have to call the manager."

Once again, the old man just muttered and did nothing.

The usher marched briskly back up the aisle, and in a moment returned with the manager.

  Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the old disheveled man, but with no success.

Finally, they summoned the police.

The officer surveyed the situation briefly, then asked, "All right, buddy, what's your name?"

"Fred," the old man moaned.

"Where you from, Fred?" asked the police officer.

With a terrible strain in his voice, and without moving, Fred replied; "The balcony"....

I think that the creators of “Thatababy” MAY have solved the problem of casting the part of Caesar in Shakespeare’s play for all time.

In the Broadway theatres, it used to be (perhaps still is) the practice to post specific, announcements related to the currently running production.  I ran across these “suggestions” for such notices in a copy of the New Yorkerprobably close to twenty years ago, but I thought them amusing enough to save.

Some Theatre-Lobby Notices by Andy Borowitz from the New Yorker:

WARNING:     In Act II there is gunfire, an explosion, and a lengthy monologue by a character named Mr. God.

WARNING:     Owing to a typographical error, the Times review of this play omitted the word “horrible.”

WARNING:     In Act III, there is full-frontal nudity, but not involving the actor you would like to see naked.

WARNING:     Any audience members you may hear laughing this evening have been paid handsomely to do so.

WARNING:     Tonight’s play is being produced in spite of explicit instructions in the dead playwright’s will to “burn all remaining copies to a crisp.”

WARNING:     The role usually played by Sir Ian McKellen will be performed tonight by the actor who played Isaac on “The Love Boat.”

WARNING:     This play has a title very similar to that of another play currently running on Broadway, which is the one you meant to purchase tickets for.

WARNING:     Tom Stoppard found the play you are about to see “confusing.”

WARNING:     Tonight’s play is performed without an intermission and you will be stuck here forever.

So much for Lobby Notices!  Moving right along to critics and reviews….

Understandably, nobody is particularly “fond” of negative reviews of their work.  I believe that it helps to be your own worst critic and always suggested to my students that they should follow that practice.  Certainly, they should be pleased when their work comes up to their (hopefully high) standards, and they should always try to figure out how to do better when it doesn’t.  But that they shouldn’t, necessarily, be too overly upset when someone makes negative comments, or too over-joyed when somebody praises their work.

I don’t think it’s particularly arrogant to suggest that only the creators truly have a grasp of what was being attempted.  I remember being criticized when I directed Beckett’s Waiting for Godot because the student critic for The Carolinian didn’t feel the characters were feeling what he thought was the “appropriate existential anguish.”  I didn’t have the heart to tell him that we (the cast and I) thought that Beckett’s point was that he (therefore, we) didn’t want to show the characters experiencing that “anguish.”

We thought that Beckett (and, therefore, we) wanted the audience to be anguished by the character’s lack of it!  We weren’t after a “look how they are suffering!” response, which, apparently, was what this student desired.  What we wanted was the “It’s very upsetting to me that these characters just can’t get it together enough to actually DO anything meaningful about their problems!”  After all, one doesn’t get anywhere by simply waiting for a solution to show up, which is, basically, what they do for the whole play.  This is why Beckett wrote the play, at least as we understood it.

Consequently, I was only frustrated that the student reviewer was unwilling to accept what he suggested was an apparently successful production because he was unwilling to look at what we were attempting, rather than what he thought we SHOULD be attempting.  Thus, he was not following Goethe’s “Rules” for critics.

Still, unpleasant reviews do make one wish to do something like what is shown in this “Shoe” cartoon.

I think I may have commented before about my distain for the “These are REAL people, NOT Actors” TV ads on some previous post. I confess that I still don’t care for the implication that actors are not real, just paid liars, but I found this Garfield comic strip much too funny to ignore. That MIGHT be because I am a “cat person,” having had cat(s) for most of the past fifty-some years, but I did find it quite funny.

My last “contribution” to this post is something which I have no recollection of having discovered, but I know that I didn’t create it.  I suspect that I ran across it in some satire of Shakespearean scholarship, or some such, but I have no idea where.  It says that it is from The Saturday Review of April 18, 1964.  That would have made it timely (just before Shakespeare’s 400th birthday), but I am fairly sure that isn’t where I saw it.  I’m pretty sure I found it reprinted somewhere else.  Still, as someone who is relatively familiar with both academia and the works of Shakespeare, I found this to be hysterical.  I hope any readers will enjoy it, as well.

CITIZENS' STATE UNIVERSITY
April 13, 1964

From:  Dr. Earl Prince King
            Dean of the Faculty

To:       Mr. William Shakespeare
            English Department

Re: Termination of Employment

Dear Professor Shakespeare:

            You are hereby relieved of your duties at Citizens' State University and are placed on sick leave for the remainder of the semester, at which time your contract will be terminated.  Due to an unexpected vacancy last summer, my predecessor had to hire you more hastily than usual, without a detailed examination of your qualifications.  (You will recall that you did not furnish references.)  However, alert Christian students have called my attention to your writings (the few that have been published); and from an alumnus in London I have secured a report about your unpublished plays, the ones in the repertory of the Globe Theater there.  In addition, various facts about your career have finally reached us here in the United States.  Some of them have even become known around the campus.  I am afraid that 1 will have to dispense with politeness and speak bluntly.

            To begin with, you are on record as having spelled your family name in at least thirteen different ways, which suggests that you are an imposter; and it has even been charged that you are not William Shakespeare at all but one Francis Bacon, a convicted bribe-taker.  When you were only nineteen, living in Stratford, England, you produced pregnancy in a girl and had to marry her so hastily that you needed special permission from the Bishop.  About two years later, after two more children, you left your family behind in Stratford and commenced residence in London, not rejoining them for about twenty-five years.  According to your-own sonnets, you have committed adultery or have tried to commit it with a certain "dark lady."  Other love affairs of yours have become common gossip.  For instance, a friend of yours, Richard Burbage, says that you cheated him (as well as your wife) by visiting a woman with whom he had made an appointment.  When he knocked at the door, you opened it and said, "Remember: William the Conqueror comes before Richard the Lion-Hearted."  (For your information, I see nothing humorous about the incident.)

            As for your writings, they reek (and I use the word advisedly) of sex and violence.  In the opinion of the University's lawyers, your very first work, Venus and Adonis, is obscene and ought to have been banned.

            Your sonnets have aroused the suspicion, not only in me, but in the University's psychiatrist, Dr. Summerfield, that you may be a pervert or that you have been one.  About half of them are declarations of love to a young man.

            The characters in your plays kill, duel, make war, steal, go to prostitutes, deprive girls of their virginity, swear, drink, talk about sex, miscegenate, and commit suicide.  They even doubt the existence of God and God's Plan.

            In Henry IV, you think it is very funny to depict a Crown Prince stealing purses.  In Romeo and Juliet, you think it is extremely funny to portray young men who brawl in the streets and rob girls of their virtue without marrying them.  In Hamlet, you ask us to feel sorry for a young man because he does not behave like a delinquent; you consider him a coward because he refuses to kill his stepfather.  Your Antony and Cleopatra are simply juvenile delinquents upon a global scale, obsessed with sex and not even married.

            At least four of your plays (if they are published) would prove offensive to minority groups at any American university.  In Othello, you try to romanticize marriage between Negroes and whites.  Not only would many whites object; many Negroes would, too.  In Romeo and Juliet and Antony and Cleopatra, you could offend Catholic students by your glorification of suicide.  In Romeo and Juliet, everybody is a Catholic and yet everybody thinks the suicide is beautiful.  Not even the Catholic priest says the lovers have gone to hell.  (I might as well say flatly, Professor Shakespeare, that I find all of your plays unbelievable.)  In The Merchant of Venice, you portray a Jew who demands a pound of Gentile flesh.

            As for religion; not one of your plays glorifies it -- at least not clearly and unambiguously.  One moment you are saying, "There's a divinity that shapes our ends"; and the next moment you are wondering whether life signifies nothing.  Are you an agnostic?  Are you an atheist?  If you are a Christian, why don't you come right out and tell us so?

            In regard to your teaching, I will only say that to the best of my knowledge, I find it very hard to believe that your four sections of freshmen are learning to write plain, simple English from you.  Frankly, in both your poetry and prose you sound as though you were intoxicated.  Your style totters on the edge of absurdity or even insanity.  You are wordy, crude, obscure, and addicted to far-fetched figures of speech.  As the former Director of the University's Testing Service, I can state with some authority that on nearly every page you exhibit emotional instability and immaturity.

            Although Citizens' State believes in academic freedom, it does not believe in academic license.  Consequently, I cannot provide you with a letter of recommendation, and no member of the English Department will be permitted to give you one.

                                                                                                Sincerely yours,

                                                                                                Earl Prince King, Ph. D.
      Distinguished Service Professor
and Dean of the Faculty.

P. S. I regret having to send this dismissal notice just before your birthday, but a deep concern for the welfare of your students compels me to act without further delay.

From: Saturday Review (April 18, 1964), p. 59

LLAP
            Dr. B

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158 A Life in the Theatre

9/13/2019

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Well, Labor Day has passed, schools have started, or are starting, and I am, once again, reminded that I am retired from a life in academic/educational theatre.  Until I retired in 2014, I had been involved with academic theatre at some level pretty continuously since about 1959, and I started doing things in educational theatre (as opposed to just attending) as early as 1956.  That’s a long time!

I started out by performing in a Sixth-Grade play adaptation of the book of Johnny Tremain, as the culmination of the three years of “Creative Dramatics” classes every student took in the Evanston schools at that time. I went on to have some involvement (mostly in the front-of-the-house) at Evanston Twp. High School, although I did have a little backstage involvement, as well.  The production I most remember being involved in was a summer one of The Importance of Being Earnest, although there were a number of others, enough that I had decided I was pretty serious about this theatre stuff.

When I went to Indiana, I got seriously involved quickly, as in my first week as a student.  From then on, as a Theatre Major, I worked on most shows in some capacity.  I acted small roles in some shows, was on shift and/or construction crews a lot, ran sound (for the production of The Tempest in 1964, we used 2 reel-to-reel tape machines, with three reels of tape for each one, and about two dozen tape cartridges for short, quick cues.  Combine that with selectable speakers all over the house and stage, and it took three of us to keep track of it all.  As I remember it, I also ran lights and stage managed some.  If I didn’t work a show, I generally ushered for it.  The summer after my Freshman year, I spent doing summer stock with a buddy of mine at Beloit College in Wisconsin.  We did ten shows in eleven weeks!  That kept us hopping. During my final summer at IU, I was a member of the Brown County Playhouse company, which was the University’s summer stock theatre in a theatre that IU ran in Nashville, IN during the summers at that time.  There, we did three different shows over the course of the summer while taking classes, as well.

When I started on my master’s degree, I stayed at IU because I was offered a Fellowship as a “Graduate Artist-in-Residence” to serve as Co-Technical Director of the Indiana Theatre Company. That meant that I helped with set construction, designed and supervised lights on the road, and was co-driver of the company truck, as well as acting in smaller roles and sharing stage management duties.  We generally left Bloomington on Thursday afternoon to drive to our first gig; setup and ran the show on Friday; then (a good deal of the time) we struck and loaded out after the performance.  On Saturday, we tech folk got up early to drive to a second gig; got setup for the rest of the company to arrive by mid-afternoon; did that night’s show; loaded out and (after sleeping a bit) drove back to Bloomington on Sunday.  For the first semester, at least, we had rehearsals most evenings Monday through Thursday to get the second and third shows ready to add to the rep, for we did three shows each year.  And we did them in rep, so we might do two different shows in the same weekend!  Over the two seasons I was involved we did: Tartuffe, The Taming of the Shrew, Amphitryon 38, The Rivals, The Glass Menagerie, and The Death of a Salesman.  Of course, we also had classes (a minimal load), with folks like Oscar Brockett, who my Theatre History students will remember wrote the history text I used. It was a busy couple of years.

After two years “on the road,” I had finished my classwork, so I spent the next year working for a local department store in Bloomington, IN, while I was writing my Master’s thesis (an analysis of the promptbook for a production of The Merry Wives of Windsor at the Theatre Royal in Birmingham, England during the latter half of the 19th Century) based on the actual promptbook, which was kept in the Lilly Library [the rare books collection] on the IU campus.  So, I’m not sure if I really should count that as a year of theatrical activity, but I’m going to do so, anyway. After all, the thesis was theatre related.

After finishing my Master’s, I took a position as a Designer/TD with the Children’s Theatre Company which I had attended as a child and which had been taken over by the local school district from Northwestern U., which had founded it.  This meant that I was, technically, a public-school teacher, but I really built sets, did lighting and props, directed a summer show, supervised crews, etc.  Much of the work was done with and by Junior High students.  We did six shows a year, three aimed at the primary grades (K-3) and three at the upper grades (4-6).  We kept busy. After two years with them, the school district lost a bond referendum (it's first such loss in history), so they had to cut a lot of stuff, including the Children’s Theatre program.  I was sorry about that as, at the time, that was the longest continually operating children’s theatre in the country.  In any case, that put me back on the job market in the summer of 1971.

I, rather quickly, was offered a position as Designer/TD by a guy named Don Loeffler at a little college in the mountains of western North Carolina; a school called Western Carolina University.  Little did I know that I’d spend the rest of my career there.  For more than forty years, I was designing and TDing sets, lights, and some props; doing some directing; promoting the theatre program (which the Dean referred to as my being “Director of Theatre”) for several years, dealing with House management; and teaching Stagecraft, Theatre Appreciation (in many variations and under several names), Intro. To Theatre, Dramatic Literature I & II, Theatre History I & II, Concept Creation, Intro to the Professions, Intro to Theatre, Intro to Professional Development, BFA Thesis, Basic Public Speaking (several variations), and probably others which don’t come to mind right away.  I was also co-founder of Western’s summer theatre program at Fontana Village in 1974 and spent two summers “in residence” out there doing rep with a faculty colleague and about a dozen students.  In the mid-1970’s, I took a year’s “leave” to do my doctoral course work in fifteen months at the University of Georgia in Athens, where I also managed the Fine Arts Auditorium.  I returned to Western, however, and spent the next several summers completing my dissertation.  In the later days of my career at Western, I also served in the Faculty Senate several times and as Chair of the Faculty for two two-year terms.

AND, I can’t forget that I got married during my first year of Graduate School at IU, and Bonnie and I had two daughters and multiple cats over the years.  And we’re still married, although I’m not sure why she has put up with me and my life for all this time.

All things considered, it’s been quite a long and, generally, happy life.  Now, this is NOT a suggestion that I am planning to die anytime soon.  I’ve still got stuff I want to do.  But, the beginning of a school year always makes me just a little nostalgic.  While I’m glad that I retired when I did (it was time!), I confess that I do miss my colleagues and, especially, my students (at least most of them).

So, while considering what to write about a lifetime of educational theatre, I looked through my collection of jokes and cartoons to see if I had anything appropriate.  I hope you enjoy what I found.

As I always tried to be a complete educator, I had to deal with my students in the classroom, as well as in the shop and rehearsal hall, so I got a bit of a grasp on what was going on in some of their heads.  Here’s some person’s pictorial view of that:

Some of my former students will remember this sign from the scene shop from “back in the day” when I was TD.

Not having had to deal with some of the challenges which are all too common in high school theatre programs, I never had to deal with the sort of thing shown below, but I certainly understand it, especially since my grandchildren have engaged in such activities.

Still college-level teaching (especially advising) did have challenges. Of course, it probably could have been worse…

I confess that I feel that I spent much too much time trying to convince students that they needed realistic expectations as to what a life in professional theatre (especially in acting) could well be like. Perhaps I should have just found this earlier.

At least I didn’t have to deal with “Theatre Parents” very often.

On the other hand, being a Lighting Designer had challenges. I wish I had thought of having a “Mothy” Award while I was still at Western. It might have simplified lighting some shows considerably.

Still, being a theatre educator wasn’t always easy. Just trying to get students to understand theatre jargon could be quite difficult.

A Theatre Dictionary
IN is down, DOWN is front,
OUT is up, UP is back,
OFF is out, ON is in,
RIGHT is left, LEFT is right.
A DROP shouldn’t and a
BLOCK AND FALL does neither.
A PROP doesn’t,
And a COVE has no water.
TRIPPING is okay.
A RUNNING CREW rarely gets anywhere.
A PURCHASE LINE will buy you nothing.
A TRAP will not catch anything.
STRIKE is work (in fact, lots of work),
And a GREEN ROOM, thankfully, usually isn’t.
Now, BREAK A LEG!

I confess, thinking back on all those years, I have to ask: “How did we all survive?”

LLAP

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163 Travelling: Apparently An Odd Bit of Pleasure

162 Advice Which You MAY Find To Be of Some Use

161 Thoughts on Halloween 2019

160 Justice: Do We Actually Understand the Concept?

159 A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Theatre

158 A Life in the Theatre

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