It’s APRIL FOOL’S DAY TODAY! That being the case, I thought I’d look through some of my files and try to find some just plain silly stuff for this post. I’ve probably been only somewhat successful, but I have tried. I guess that, although I like to think I have a reasonably good sense of humor, I haven’t really concentrated enough on collecting “just plain silly stuff” for these posts. Oh, well, I do what I can with what I’ve got. I hope you enjoy these choices.
Since it’s turning April, we’ve just finished March, which reminds me of the fact that a longish while back a guy named Julius had a particularly crummy day in mid-March (which date was just a couple of weeks ago). I think that day has been written about in some history books and even a play, or two, a bit later on. Did’ya ever wonder how that incident REALLY came about? According Leigh Rube, THIS is the real dope.
Since it’s turning April, we’ve just finished March, which reminds me of the fact that a longish while back a guy named Julius had a particularly crummy day in mid-March (which date was just a couple of weeks ago). I think that day has been written about in some history books and even a play, or two, a bit later on. Did’ya ever wonder how that incident REALLY came about? According Leigh Rube, THIS is the real dope.
Obviously, I can’t swear to this being any more factual than the other versions of what might have actually happened, but this does seem about as plausible as Bill What’shisname’s story.
On a different track, sometimes I run across a quote from a person (or a fictional character) which strikes me as amusing. Here’s a few examples of such things:
Susan Calvin, the robopsychologist created by Issac Asimov for some of his “robot” science fiction stories, is said to have stated that: “When someone says that evolution is only a theory, perhaps one should point out that so is gravity, but that jumping off a high-rise balcony still doesn’t seem wise.”
Dan Quayle, former Vice President, is reported to have said: “*Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.”
George Bergman, former Professor of Mathematics at the University of California, Berkeley, noted: “There is no time like the pleasant.”
Gib Lewis, Texas Speaker of the House, said: *This is unparalyzed in the state's history.”
Unnamed sources (as far as I have been able to determine) have been quoted as having said the following:
“The amount of education you have determines your loot in life.”
“Antidotes are what you take to prevent dotes.”
“The bride was wearing an old lace gown that fell to the floor as she walked down the isle.”
“The doctor felt the man's purse and said there was no hope.”
“Female moths are called myths.”
Thinking about comments like that MIGHT well explain why I’m fond of THIS sign (see below)!
On a different track, sometimes I run across a quote from a person (or a fictional character) which strikes me as amusing. Here’s a few examples of such things:
Susan Calvin, the robopsychologist created by Issac Asimov for some of his “robot” science fiction stories, is said to have stated that: “When someone says that evolution is only a theory, perhaps one should point out that so is gravity, but that jumping off a high-rise balcony still doesn’t seem wise.”
Dan Quayle, former Vice President, is reported to have said: “*Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.”
George Bergman, former Professor of Mathematics at the University of California, Berkeley, noted: “There is no time like the pleasant.”
Gib Lewis, Texas Speaker of the House, said: *This is unparalyzed in the state's history.”
Unnamed sources (as far as I have been able to determine) have been quoted as having said the following:
“The amount of education you have determines your loot in life.”
“Antidotes are what you take to prevent dotes.”
“The bride was wearing an old lace gown that fell to the floor as she walked down the isle.”
“The doctor felt the man's purse and said there was no hope.”
“Female moths are called myths.”
Thinking about comments like that MIGHT well explain why I’m fond of THIS sign (see below)!
I suspect that the reason why we haven’t actually attempted to follow that sign’s advice might be because it’s REALLY HARD to alter stupidity, whereas what we insist on calling “artificial intelligence” is basically just a computer program into which we can input some sort of question and which will then quickly sort through a big database and present us with the lowest common denominator of related information under the pretext of evaluating data and “thinking.” Personally, I really like the cartoon below because the machine (map?) shown appears to actually present information which is (probably) VERIFIABLE, and therefore might be considered “factual”, not just the most commonly presented solution.
I suppose that my desire for accurate information, rather than just the most common response, could be construed to suggest that I’m no brighter than Bill the Cat, the multi-talented character from the old Bloom County cartoon. Now Bill actually ran for President several times, which might not be a recommendation as to his intelligence, but he (un?) fortunately never was elected. Of course, it’s possible that he might have done as well. or better, than some of the “winning” candidates. In any case, for anyone who might not remember, or know of, Bill, I enclose the following image (with the suggestion that you look him up):
I ran across the cartoon below (from Thatababy) a while back and found it VERY confusing. You see, about as far back as I can remember I had known this story and I had never questioned it because it always seemed so transparently obvious to me.
Now, perhaps it’s because in those long ago days when I was growing up near Chicago, Borden Dairy products were to be found being delivered (by milkmen) to many homes AND could be found on the shelves in most grocery stores. Anyway, it seems like I ALWAYS knew about Elsie the Cow (the primary logo-symbol of Borden Dairy products) so it was always obvious to me that if that company had developed a casein (milk protein-based) glue product that it would be named for Elsie’s husband, Elmer the Bull. What could be quite as perfectly appropriate as that? (Comment: the wording of this cartoon seems to suggest that references to / pictures of Elsie’s family were rather uncommon. That’s not the way I remember it and Wikipedia seems to support the frequent use of the family’s images in Borden’s advertising. RSB)
Now, perhaps it’s because in those long ago days when I was growing up near Chicago, Borden Dairy products were to be found being delivered (by milkmen) to many homes AND could be found on the shelves in most grocery stores. Anyway, it seems like I ALWAYS knew about Elsie the Cow (the primary logo-symbol of Borden Dairy products) so it was always obvious to me that if that company had developed a casein (milk protein-based) glue product that it would be named for Elsie’s husband, Elmer the Bull. What could be quite as perfectly appropriate as that? (Comment: the wording of this cartoon seems to suggest that references to / pictures of Elsie’s family were rather uncommon. That’s not the way I remember it and Wikipedia seems to support the frequent use of the family’s images in Borden’s advertising. RSB)
Anyway, when I saw this Thatababy strip, I admit I was surprised, because Borden DID, in fact, develop such a glue and name it for Elmer. By the way, Elmer’s is now made with polyvinyl acetate instead of being a milk-based product, but It was CREATED as a milk-based one, which made it quite logical, at least to me, why Borden had used Elmer’s name for a such a product. (I actually worked with casein scene paints, which use an adhesive made from milk protein as the binder, early on in my career in tech theatre, which made the Borden connection even more obvious and logical, at least to me.)
“Elmer’s Glue-All” was, in fact, first developed and marketed by the Borden Company in the very late 1940’s when I was 3-4 years old, so I was not worrying about such things at that point. By the time I started using it, I suspect that I just figured that it was a handy product for what I needed. Anyway, it never surprised me that the use of Elmer’s name wasn’t obvious, but the fact that EVERYBODY DIDN’T know that Elmer’s was created by a dairy company (and about Elsie and Elmer) DID! I guess it just never occurred to me that this story wasn’t universally known, and, apparently, still isn’t. Anyway, I’m glad we got that straightened out!
To attempt to wrap this up, I just thought I’d pass along something that all “cookie fanatics” (isn’t that most of us?) need to know. Someone has finally figured out how to
keep all (or at least a higher percentage) of the cookies for oneself — See the image below:
“Elmer’s Glue-All” was, in fact, first developed and marketed by the Borden Company in the very late 1940’s when I was 3-4 years old, so I was not worrying about such things at that point. By the time I started using it, I suspect that I just figured that it was a handy product for what I needed. Anyway, it never surprised me that the use of Elmer’s name wasn’t obvious, but the fact that EVERYBODY DIDN’T know that Elmer’s was created by a dairy company (and about Elsie and Elmer) DID! I guess it just never occurred to me that this story wasn’t universally known, and, apparently, still isn’t. Anyway, I’m glad we got that straightened out!
To attempt to wrap this up, I just thought I’d pass along something that all “cookie fanatics” (isn’t that most of us?) need to know. Someone has finally figured out how to
keep all (or at least a higher percentage) of the cookies for oneself — See the image below:
🖖🏻
LLAP,
Dr. B
LLAP,
Dr. B
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