328 Valentine's Day Approaches

​Well, as I write this post I notice that Valentine’s Day (Saint Valentine’s Day, if you want to be completely correct) is approaching, and will be here before my next scheduled post.  I am told that Valentine became associated with romantic love during the 14th Century and that Geoffrey Chaucer helped popularize this idea.  In any case, that idea is commonly associated with Valentine, so it seemed appropriate to see what I might come up with to chat about in relation to that idea.  So here goes.

I DO suggest celebrating this day with the one you love the most.  I do NOT suggest that you (men!) follow the example of the man in the story below.  That would appear to be less than wise for obvious reasons.

Since most of us think about Romantic Love on this day especially, it’s probably wise to make sure that one is aware of the complications of the “dating” process which has become a major part of seeking that status.  Dating, of course, implies meeting a potential candidate with whom to enter into the “Romantic Love”status.  This part of the whole process seems to have become more complicated than it used to be, as is suggested in this Non Sequitur strip from a while back.

​SOMETIMES, however, the “relationship” actually progresses (and stays OFF of YOUTUBE, etc., long enough) to actually become a “thing.”  Most guys, I am forced to admit, don’t always find it easy to admit, let alone explain, their attraction to (and/or affection for) a particular potential partner, even when they really try to do so.  It would seem that there is considerable pressure among much of the MACHO gender, to suppress expressing ones “emotional” side, which doesn’t mean that it doesn’t sneak out from time to time, but it may take a close examination of what is SAID to determine what is MEANT.  

I offer this from For Better or For Worse as an example

I would suggest that Gordo may have some ‘splainin’ to do to Tracey, as she doesn’t seem to appreciate his comments related to “trade-en her in” in the last frame.  Oh, well, these little things either work themselves out, or they don’t, and the people move on one way or another.

Surprisingly enough, Jon and Garfield seem to have actually found someone who TOTALLY fits their mutual desires.  

​I confess that I frequently wonder why Liz actually puts up with Jon (and/or Garfield), but, as the Romans said “De gustibus non est disputandum” (rough translation: “There’s no accounting for taste.”) which certainly seem to be true in “Romantic” matters.

In general, however, it appears that a great many people DO end up in a “Romantic” relationship which may well last for an extended period of time.  Some of them even come to appreciate that relationship as becoming an important part of their life (which probably often defies explanation, which is why it’s “ROMANTIC!” 

As an example of such a relationship, I offer this image of Hagar (better known as Hagar the Horrible), who doesn’t seem as “horrible” as he usually tries to be in THIS strip.

Now, this strip (below) from Pickles seems to suggest that a certain amount of “give and take” may, on occasion, enter into longer-term relationships.

​I don’t find that partnership either surprising, nor UN “romantic.”  I’ve always considered most worthwhile relationships to imply a certain amount of cooperation, and (since that’s worked for me in my quite lengthy relationship with Bonnie — since about late 1964 or early 1965), it still seems to be reasonable to me.  Hence, I don’t find Opal’s question offensive and/or unreasonable.  In fact, said the guy who has usually done the dishes, when he was able to get home for dinner (what with rehearsals, performances, etc.) most of the time for all these years, it seems to be little enough for me to do, considering what Bonnie does for me.

I confess that when I encounter ideas like those expressed in the Between Friends strip below relating to the expectations of younger people, I just feel sorry.

​I guess that I have always thought that the purpose of a “Romantic” relationship was the desire to establish (and to maintain) a permanence and stability in the relationship which seems to be most desirable for remaining together, having children and continuing a permanent one which is actually healthy and desirable.  It may not be the fastest way to get rich, but I’ve never thought that just acquiring money was an intelligent way to achieve happiness.  AND, as I watch the news, it seems to me that a great number of the “rich and famous” are, to my way of thinking, rather sad, unhappy people desperately trying to buy happiness and finding that it’s not really available from just having money.  

I’d suggest that a bit of a sense of humor, a willingness to share the joys AND the sorrows of life, and to just support your partner is probably more important than just having great wealth.  Which isn’t to say that having money isn’t nice, but I think it can be a bit of a burden, as well.  After all, money doesn’t make one laugh.

Speaking of non-financial partnerships, cooperation, and  humor, I ran across this little story a while back and found it amusing.  I would NOT suggest that guys should repeat what the husband in this story says, but, I will confess that I DID find this funny.  The story is entitled: “A Wife is ABCDEFGHIJK” and it goes like this:

After being married for 25 years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.  


He looked at her carefully, then said, 'You are A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.’  


'What does that mean?' she asked suspiciously.


He said, 'Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous and Hot!’


She beamed at him happily and said: 'Oh, that's so lovely!  But what about I, J and K?’


Then he said, ’I'm Just Kidding!’


NOTE: I understand that the swelling in his eye is going down and the doctors are reasonably confident that there was no permanent damage.

As Valentine’s Day approaches, I hope that you have a chance to spend some time with your “Romantic Partner,” whomever he (or she) may be.  I’d suggest a quiet place where you can just be together, talk quietly and LISTEN to each other.  I think you’ll discover that that’s a kind of richness you can’t put in a bank.

I’ll be back in a couple of weeks,

🖖🏻 LLAP,

Dr. B